TRADITIONS

To paraphrase an old french quote, plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose, to; the more things stay the same, the more they change.

No where is tradition more evident than at holidays; festivities and celebrations that are passed down year after year.  In the U.S. our holidays serve as a yearly history lesson, albeit not the the best way to teach, but at least a reminder of those events in our history that are important and descriptive of the marrow of our culture and serves as a snapshot of who we are and how we came to be that way.

For us here the July 4th commemoration of the founding of our country is probably the biggest holiday, followed closely by it's precursor, Thanksgiving.  Christmas is a holiday universally celebrated.  For the purposes of this post I'll discuss the last two mentioned and put forth what traditions we as a family have followed in their regard and how the following of tradition has led to changes in those self same traditions.

  

For the first 17 years of my existence, Thanksgiving was always celebrated at Aunt Nellie's.  The meal was always the same: roast turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, rutabagas, green beans, gravy, pumpkin and apple pie with a slice of sharp cheddar cheese on the side.

Interestingly, for a large family of French-Canadian descent, and who were related to more than half the people in our city of 15,000 inhabitants, (for the longest time I thought we were related to everyone

in the city) our dinner was attended by only immediate family: Uncle Ed and Aunt Nellie, Mom, dad, and me and later on by my brother and sister, 10 and 12 years younger respectively.

In 1975 my wife and I together with the first two of our three children moved into our present home. And for the next 30 years, with one or two exceptions, Thanksgiving was celebrated in our dining room.  There were never less than 10 and sometimes upwards nigh onto 25 guests surrounding our table.  On more than one occasion our table, with all the leaves set in, was extended into the living room.  The majority in attendance were family but it was also our habit to invite those friends and acquaintances who for what ever reason had no place to partake of Thanksgiving.

For the last 5 years, with our children scattered hither and yon, and with the Friday following Thanksgiving often a work day for many, family gatherings here at the homestead on Thanksgiving areno more.  Now my wife and I are the dispossessed, so-to-speak, and become the invitees of friends rather than the hosts.

Of  late we have been part of a large international/ family celebration which takes place at a good friend's home and in addition to us and their immediate family is attended by an ecumenical contingent of other modern orphans of circumstance.  This year's celebration just past was attended by representatives from France, Spain, Japan, Korea, Belarus, Iran, China, Canada, Holland and of course US born folks.  Nearly thirty, if not more, people came together in thanks for our blessings.

The tradition has been carried on but the venue, food and faces change.

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One of the inviolable traditions that my wife and I have followed is that Christmas, particularly Christmas day, will be celebrated in whatever place we and our children call home.  This year will be the first year where that home will not be ours for the majority of our family.

Since our oldest grandchild is 15, the baton could have been passed long before now, but the 2500 mile distance between our home on the Canadian border and theirs, nearly on the Mexican border, has prevented us from celebrating Christmas together.  In fact, regrettably, we have never celebrated Christmas morning with our 2 oldest grandchildren; more's the pity.  So our home has remained the seat for family Christmas' observance for these past 43 years, 35 in this abode alone.  Our oldest and youngest children usually made it home as well as various brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts and uncles, boyfriends and girlfriends and found something under our tree for them come Christmas morning.

Our youngest is a father now, his daughter turned 1 year old in Oct.  They live five hours from us through two snow belts.  With the 25th of Dec. falling on a weekend this year, my wife and I, God willing and the snow's not too high, we will spend Christmas morning with our new grand daughter in her home; as it should be.

And that's how things change as traditions are passed along.



TRADITIONS

The two holidays that exemplify tradition to me come at the end of each year with , first, Thanksgiving, followed close behind by Christmas. It's at this time of year that I reflect back on the things which give me comfort and solace; whether it be Bing Crosby singing White Christmas, or the aroma of Diane's fresh baked Cinnamon buns, there is a treasure chest full of sensory delights that contribute to my relishing the life and times I've been granted by the Grace of God and his son. Traditions change, and it seems even more so today. One of the traditions that change is the venue of the celebrations. For our immediate family, the venues migrated to the home where the young children resided. With each migration our traditions are tweaked and blended in with those we grew up with, bringing a freshness to the old habits.

While Christmas day will, once again be greeted warmly at the Morristown Manse this year of our Lord, 2009, two of our children will be absent from the gathering around the tree. For there is a new member of the family making her stamp on our Christmas: Sophia Aubrey LaRock will be the focus of Christmas in Buffalo with her Parents and the new tradition begins. Weather permitting, Grandma and grandpa along with auntie Michelle will make their way to Sophia's home to celebrate with her, her first Christmas.

For a number of years now grandma and grandpa have traveled to Texas to celebrate Christmas in the first week of December with our middle son and our two grand daughters. This year that celebration took place at Disney World in Florida.

Our traditions are changing; as they should.

Along with Bing Crosby etal, "twas the night before Christmas" has always been a favorite, of mine, to read and recite at Christmas tide. In the 1970's a new missive rose to the top of my favorite reads and audutory enjoyments. The "Walton's" Christmas album came out with a recitation by Will Geer, as Grandpa Walton, telling us what Christmas means to him. Since then I've always made it a point to read and listen to this piece and it has become a regular in my things to reflect upon and enjoy, if not all year long , at least at this time of year when we celebrate the birthday of Jesus Christ.

I've published that piece here on the blog before and it bears republishing again this year:

Grandpa's Christmas Wish Lyrics by Will Geer - Grandpa Walton Christmas Message, What is Christmas?

http://www.santasearch.org/playmusic.asp?ID=1731

It is a time when some of your dreams come true. Every year it roles around and takes you by surprise some of the time, especially when you’re as close to a 100 years old as I am. You think...it Can’t be time for another one, but there it is with all it’s hope and joy and the promise of the wishes granted. I bet you wonder what I wish for. What could an old man wish for? Maybe you think I would wish to be young again. I don’t want that. Being young is a painful thing. Being young and in love to boot, which most young people are, is even more agony. I’ll tell you what I wish. I’d wish for the power to return some of the love that’s been given me. I’d wish the time and place for all that giving could be commemorated like the heart I carved on the tree around your Grandmother’s and my initials. I wish too for more days to my life. Time...time to give to children some of the beauty of this Earth that has been revealed to me. A drop of water is a wondrous thing.A spade full of earth is a kingdom in itself. A cloud is worth watching as it passes from one horizon to another. A bird building its nest is as wondrous as men building the Pyramid, and any green thing that grows is proof that God exists. It all comes into focus at Christmas. It is a tender time. We grow cautious because we open ourselves to love. We exchange gifts, but what those presents really say is "I love you." It makes some folks uncomfortable to say or hear these words. Maybe it’s because they’ve never learned the secret of the given heart. There are more takers than givers in the world. People, communities even countries spending their time grubbing and rooting for the goods of this earth like pigs after acorns in the Fall of the year. This is a country with a given heart and I pray it will always be so. It’s a good country and it’s part of our strength, something that we brought with us as pioneers that we can share with the fellow who is down on his luck, with those who suffered calamities: with the loss of their homes or land or their hope. This is a family with a giving heart. You children may squabble and bicker among yourselves but you’ve been taught to love and to give, and that’s the greatest present your Momma and Daddy could have given you. So take pleasure in the trappings of Christmas. Be merry like the songs say. Revel in the tinsel and the glitter and the sparkle and sing the old songs for all the joy that’s in them and the memories they bring back. But to touch the real Christmas, to feel the true spirit of the season, look to your own heart and find all the secret treasures that they’re there to give. There is one wish that I make every year. I never said it aloud before, but I’ll tell it to you now. I wish for all the seasons I have known, endlessly to come and go; the dogwood Spring, the watermelon Summer, the russet and gold of Autumn. I wish for Christmas to come again and for each of us to be here again next year at this time...together, safe, warm and loved as we are at this moment.

To all my friends, cyber friends, facebook friends, co-workers, past and present, my children and grand children And most especially my Wife Diane: Merry Christmas. Thanks for brightening my life at this time and all throughout the years.

http://www.santasearch.org/playmusic.asp?ID=1731

City sidewalks, busy sidewalks
Dressed in holiday style
In the air
There's a feeling of Christmas
Children laughing
People passing
Meeting smile after smile
And on ev'ry street corner you'll hear
Silver bells, silver bells
It's Christmas time in the city
Ring-a-ling, hear them sing
Soon it will be Christmas day
Strings of street lights
Even stop lights
Blink a bright red and green
As the shoppers rush home with their treasures
Hear the snow crunch
See the kids bunch
This is Santa's big scene
And above all this bustle
You'll hear
Silver bells, silver bells
It's Christmas time in the city
Ring-a-ling, hear them sing
Soon it will be Christmas day